Doors Closed & Windows Opened

Doors Closed: My final day at the school was Friday. I didn't want any type of "goodbye" anything--I prefer to slip out quietly. But my dear dear friends and co-workers had other plans. This is the cake they had made for a farewell reception. It was gorgeous, and delicious. The closed door is that after 16 years, my morning routine--in fact, any routine, is going to be very very different. I kind of breezed through the week, thinking this was not going to be any problem at all! But on Thursday night it hit me-- the desk wasn't to be mine anymore--I wouldn't look across the hall and see a familiar face--no one to run down the hall and tell jokes to--no one to laugh with and have fits with--no one to gripe at -- and it began to feel like my heart was made of lead. And Friday, it was way too cheerful around there--false cheerfulness on my part. It was touching that these people, who have become more than friends after all this long, would send such wordy cards, attempt to show their care through the wonderful gifts, flowers, etc. But I made it till 4:00 without a tear shed. Then I got in the car, closed the door and drove away from the office for the last time as "one of the gang". And my heart physically hurt--it felt a bit chipped and raw. And the tears flowed. Uncontrollably--sobs coming from deep down inside. I don't like change--with people anyway. I want to keep everyone in the same spot forever and ever. And this spot was erased. It broke my heart.

The above an below pics are of the beautiful flowers I received. Can you believe one of my boss's friends (and a dear friend of mine also) sent me a dozen red roses!!! They are really really stunning and they smell so fragrant. Just a sample of the expressions of thanks and care I received.

Windows Opened: This morning I met with the "previous" PREVIOUS I SAY! owners and handed over a lump sum of my life. We went over bookkeeping, deliveries, orders, and started making plans to begin working together on Tuesday morning. It's really here. I own a catering company--and I have orders!!! I went down to the kitchen THREE times today---just because I have the key and I CAN!!! It's mine---I can open any drawer--look in the frig and freezer, and I emptied the trash and brought the dirty towels home to wash. Then I went for the groceries that we need for Tuesday, and made arrangements to have both orders delivered. This feels comfortable and right. And I have more confidence than I have had in weeks.

So, that's what's been going on in my life the past 48 hours. It's time to raise that window and let the new in!!!

Have a great weekend!